If You Want to Manage Your Emotions Start With Your Words!
In my post last week, I talked about the wisdom of words and their power to transform our behavior. If you want to remind me, here is my article.
Today, as I promised, I will talk about why expressing our emotions with the right words is the most important criterion for mastering emotion management and ways to expand our vocabulary.
Most of us use standard words to express our feelings. Sad, happy, angry, stressed, excited… And in fact, the limitation of our words narrows down the actions our brain takes while trying to manage that emotion. Let me expand a little more:
After decades of research in the science of emotion at Northeastern University, academics concluded:
“The most important job of your brain is to think. Not feeling or even seeing. The work of the brain; is to keep your body alive and well so that you can survive and thrive…
So how does your brain do this?
Like a sophisticated fortune teller, our brain is constantly guessing. That’s how it happened, so that’s it. He said so, so this will happen. And these predictions ultimately translate into the emotions we experience and the expressions we perceive in other people.”
And now the good news: Since our brains essentially create our emotions, we can teach our brains to label them more precisely (using the right words) and then use this detailed information to generate optimal behaviors.”
Emotional scientist Prof. Dr. Lisa Barrett says one of the best things we can do for our emotional health is to become adept at naming our emotions. So first we need to define the emotion correctly.
We humans usually express ourselves with a few emotional words.
– How do you feel?
– Is it good? So how are you feeling? This emotion can include: Happy, satisfied, satisfied, excited, relaxed, cheerful, hopeful, inspired, proud, admired, grateful…
– How do you feel?
– It sucks!
– Is he okay? So how are you feeling? The word lousy has 50 shades. This emotion can include: Angry, heavy, hasty, vindictive, grumpy, remorseful, gloomy, embarrassed, restless, fearful, offended, worried, jealous, sad, melancholic, depressed…
If we manage to identify our emotion correctly, our brain will have many different options to anticipate emotions and generate appropriate behaviors.
If we can predict and categorize our emotions more efficiently, it will be easier to discover what triggers them and manage our behavior towards our emotions.
Learn new words
The reason some people manage their emotions better than others has to do with noticing emotional details. People who can describe their emotions in great detail are emotion experts.
Because the person who can distinguish whether what he feels is anger, disappointment or despair; He has the power to discover both the true reason for his feelings and how he can manage his feelings.
The easiest way to do this is to learn new words. You probably didn’t think of learning new words as a path to emotional health, but that’s how the neurological system works. Words your perspective; Your perspective affects your reactions and your reactions affect your behavior.
It may seem strange to you, but research on people who can describe their feelings more clearly reveals that:
These people go to fewer doctors, use less medication, are more resistant to stress, and feel more satisfied with life. Convinced of the power of words?
Words can change the world, don’t deny their power.
Therefore, learn as many new words as possible. Read books outside of your comfort zone or watch publications where you will meet different worlds such as festival films and documentaries.
Don’t just settle for ‘Happy’: look for and use more specific words like ‘Enthusiastic’, ‘Enjoyable’ and ‘Understanded’.
Learn the difference between the word ‘discouraged’ or ‘sad’ and ‘sad’.
And don’t limit yourself to words in your native language. Choose another language. Dutch sense of togetherness, Gezellig and great guilt in Greek, like Enohi.
Search for words that have no lexical equivalent in your language. Every word is another invitation to build your experiences in new ways.
An emotionally intelligent person not only has many concepts, but also knows which ones to use and when. Just as painters learn to see subtle nuances in colors that others cannot see, you can improve your categorization skills.
Let’s say you get bored with the “always me, my priorities” style of a person with a high ego at work.
Again, you are having a disagreement in a meeting. You may argue with him, push things up, or you may be fighting with him internally.
But instead, ask yourself how you really feel:
– Are you worried because you think you will not be able to complete your project on time?
– Are you afraid that it will make you look unsuccessful against others?
– Bored because it reminds you of someone else?
Depending on the response, you may be more adept at getting into a sudden argument with that person. You can do better than get angry and exhaust yourself.